My Xavi can be a sensitive soul at times…
As I wrote my blog post yesterday, tears were streaming down my face as I remembered the wonderful gifts of my grandparents. He saw me and asked, “Are your eyes red, Mama?” And I said, “Yes, they probably are.” He watched me silently for a few minutes and then asked, “Why are your eyes red, Mama? Why are they wet?” I said, “I feel sad, Xavi.” He accepted this and went on with his playing.
Yesterday evening, as I lay down beside him at bedtime, I laid as I normally do: with my back to him, flashlight resting on my shoulder to shine on the book I was reading. Usually, this causes no comment, but I think he has associated this posture with the times when my back hurts and I can’t comfortably lie in his bed any other way. So he began his questions:
“Is your back hurting, Mama?”
“No, not today, Xavi.”
“Is your head hurting, Mama?”
“No, it’s not, Xavi.”
“Are you sad then?”
“No, I’m not Xavi.”
“Oh. Ok.”
He settled down to sleep then. I guess since I had answered no to all of those his world was secure. If I had said yes, I know from past occasions, he would have pressed for “why” and maybe even “how”. If I had said yes, he’d have stretched bedtime out longer, maybe just seeking knowledge and reassurance about me.
