Mom is Just a Nickname

I’ve got a writing assignment to do. I’ve got a story to write. I’ve got a story to edit. I’ve got chores to do. I’ve got gifts to make. I need to eat breakfast.

I suppose breakfast should come first, but after that I’m not sure what to do!

Need to focus, prioritize….oh man, I am so bad at that.

I really think it does. I look at the pile beside me and wonder where it all came from. It’s mail, magazines, papers from school, notebooks I write in, index cards I make notes on, things I’ve printed up…and did I mention the mail?

I’m still trying to figure out how it all ends up on my desk though. The mail is supposed to go to my husband’s desk, where the bills get paid. The papers from school are supposed to get filed promptly in the school box or pitched. My notebooks have a home. My magazines have a home. And yet, they sit on my desk and apparently spend their days engaged in lurid moments of reproduction so that the paper pile is at least an inch higher every day!

I suppose I need to sift through it and seperate the randy sheets of paper. I’m tired of having to shove them out of the way when I’m looking for something. Time to shift some of the pile to hubby’s desk so that he can watch them multiply!

(Oh, I’m gonna catch it for that comment when he reads it. lol. Oh well. Love ya, honey!)

There’s a hole in my sock. It’s one of my last pairs of block socks. I probably should get more.

I’m tired. Maybe I should make coffee. Maybe I should stop staying up until midnight and beyond. Maybe I’m getting old. I don’t remember having such a hard time staying up til midnight, getting up at 7 and functioning properly through the day when I was 20.

I heard a theory that when our kids start getting older and doing more for themselves, that we should never show them how well we do something. Like, if you were coloring with your kid and they were scribbling all over the page you should also scribble rather than coloring in the lines.

I remember I also believed this way at one time, when J was a baby. I never wanted her to feel bad for how her drawings looked compared to mine. (I can draw decently, myself, although I’m no artist.)

Now, when I draw with my kids, I draw my way and let them draw theirs. I emphasize how we’re all different, how some of us have had more practice, and how with practice and learning, we can all get better if we want to. Now, I think it’s important for them to see the things I can do well. I think it’s important for them to see someone doing something well so that they can emulate them. And I think it’s important for them to know that every one’s talents lie in different directions. I tend to be more artistic and their dad tends to be more technologically savvy. We think differently and rather than downplaying those differences, I like to celebrate them.

It’s a shift in thinking, I suppose, from where I was 8 or 9 years ago. Nice to know I can change.

I’ve changed in other ways too. Housekeeping has always been a special challenge for me. I’ve spent years and years stressing about my house not being neat enough, clean enough, or uncluttered enough.

I never felt like I could live up to my mom or my grandmother. My mom has worked full time for as long as I can remember, for goodness sake, and her house has always, in my memory and to my knowledge, been very clean. She has told me over and over not to stress about it, that her house wasn’t always so neat and that it is hard to maintain a clean house with small children. I have trouble believing that her house has ever been less than spic and span. My grandmother also kept a very clean house, with routines and habits that no doubt helped keep it that way. Try as they both did, I resisted learning about the nuts and bolts of keeping a clean house for years. And by the time I started a family and wanted to learn, my pride kept me from asking too many questions.

Now, I finally feel like I’m learning. My house is definitely lived in, and there are still piles of paper clutter here and there. Some rooms, like the kids’ rooms, seem to be continuously breeding messes. Still, the main part of the house is usually fairly neat and anymore it only takes me a couple of hours to straighten and clean the whole house. I’m feeling pretty good about this change in my life.

And then, some days, I feel like it’s the grubbiest house in the world and nothing I do will ever get it uncluttered. But that’s my brain for you. Today, the world is sunshiny and I have rose colored glasses. Yesterday, it was a different story. I love the cycles. meh.

I’m sure I could go on…random thoughts are like that…so random. But I’ll close it out now and thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this.

I think it’s about time to edit my NaNoNovel. I still haven’t finished it, but I think I want to go back and clean it up before I write the end. The beginning is so scattered and disjointed, I need to get it put together.

What I could use, though, as i go through the editing process, are some people who would be willing to read, critique and give feedback on the plot and characters and such. If you’re interested in doing this, could you drop me a line? I probably wouldn’t have anything ready for reading until after the holidays, in any case, so please don’t let the stress of the season keep you from volunteering if you’re so inclined.

In any case…my crochet project is calling. Guess I should go work on it..or help the kids get to bed…or something.

My top ten favorite books, in no particular order:

Sweet Liar, by Jude Devereaux
The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, by J.R.R. Tolkien
The Trilogy about Arthur and Merlin (Crystal Cave, Hollow Hills and Last Enchantment) by Mary Stewart
Wolfwalker by Tara K. Harper
The Merry Gentry series by Laurell K. Hamilton
Just about any book by Anne McCaffrey
Just about any book by Mercedes Lackey
The Deryni books by Katherine Kurtz
Ring of Endless Light by Madeleine L’engle
The Harry Potter books by J.K. Rowling

Ok, I cheated. I’d have an easier time listing my top ten favorite authors than I do listing my favorite books. How can you choose a favorite of Anne McCaffrey’s books?? (Dragon Song remains at the top. It was the first of her books I ever read…in the sixth grade!)

Some of them I love for their sheer entertainment value (Merry Gentry and Harry Potter, for example) and others taught me a lot about life and living (Ring of Endless Light, for example)…Some hold precious memories: LoTR is a fascination I share wiht my Dad who introduced me to Tolkien by reading The Hobbit to me when I was 7 or 8; The Arthur series is one my mom introduced me to and began my love of all things Arthurian, as well as my fascination with rewritten fairy tales and legends. I was already hooked on all things magical though!

What are your favorite books or favorite authors?