Mom is Just a Nickname

Being a mom is sucking all of my time up.  One of the kidlets has lice, so every waking moment, it seems, is dedicated to picking lice and nits and doing laundry.  I’m also really trying to get up that oomph I talked about to get the house clean and keep it clean.

For some reason, the baking bug bit me the last couple of days.  Homemade cornbread to go with the homemade white chicken chili; homemade pear-blueberry cobbler; homemade whole wheat banana bread.  I wonder what will come over me next? I wonder why that energy isn’t being more appropriately directed to cleaning the house?

For reasons which shall remain nameless here, we’re getting rid of a Sauder-style bookcase (ok, a watermelon went bad and sent its watery juiciness beneath it – I swear my house isn’t THAT bad).  My husband and I spent part of the day sorting through the books on the shelf and found a bunch to get rid of.  Sometime this week I’ll take a trip to the used book store and see what kind of store credit I can get for them.  It may not be much, but it will help pay for books for the kids and such.  Hey, I wanted to get a move on decluttering…just not sure I wanted to be pushed to it by a rotting watermelon!

Anyhow, this mom has got to get back to picking “nits and fleas” (as my youngest kidlet put it)….so, back to being ‘Just a Mom’ for awhile.

So many of my friends and family are welcoming babies into the world this year or next.  My sister, two cousins, and friends!  I’m happy for all of them, but sad for myself.  My babies are getting older…My oldest turns 10 in October.  TEN! I said TEN!!!!!  I’ve been a mom for ten years, while some of my peers still don’t have any children.  I’m not sure which, if either, missed out.  I mean, I do kind of wish I had had more time as an adult before having children.  But, that would have meant passing up the time I have had with my kids…and that would be a sore loss for me.

I’m trying to balance the past, the present and the future.  The things I might have done if I’d misspent my youth might have led me down a far less pleasant path.  I now sit in my home, surrounded by the family I love, and know that I made a decision that was healthy for me…even if it seemed insane at the time, and even if it led to some great heartache.  All the things I wish I had had back before meeting Topher or having kids, I can still find today: good friends, a higher education, a satisfying career.

I’m slowly learning that it’s never too late to craft the life I wish I had had.  I’m stubborn though, so it takes me time to get there.  So, as I toast the newest additions to our family and I admire the pictures of my friends’ newborns, I remember with sweet nostalgia the days when my children were that tiny, and I look forward.  I look forward to all that is yet to come.  Like those little innocent babes, I’m just starting off in a new world.

We’re somewhere around halfway through J’s summer break from school.  The kids are bored with each other, and I’m bored of refereeing their constant spats.  I need some inspiration for cheap and easy things to do with them at home!  Getting anywhere in town is expensive these days and I’m trying to cut back to only the most basic trips from home.  Combining trips is a lovely idea, but I can only combine so many activities in one day before I’m a worn out mess!

Our fish tank is providing some entertainment at least.  We all three spend a lot of time staring into the tank, studying it, trying to see what the animals are up to now.  Yesterday was an exciting day because we discovered two tiny snails.  We have three large mysterio snails, but these little guys are different.  They must have hitched a ride on some of the new plants we just got!  I know that snails can sometimes take over a tank, but I’ve also read that they can be good for it, so for now, we’ll leave them and let them eat the foul stuff in there.

It was even bigger excitement when we realized that we have some fry in the tank!  The only breeds of fish we have right now red wag platy (4 of them) and silver lyretail mollies (4 of them).  Both breeds are livebearers and we suspected that the two platy females were pregnant within a week of having them home.  I hope there is enough cover for the fry to survive, but if not, I guess we know there’s population control in the tank. (I know, that’s a horrible way to look at it!) We’ve thought about setting a nursery tank, but for now we don’t have the resources to do that.

I’m not sure if it’s the search for something to do or the realization that in about a month X will be starting preschool, but I’ve been weighted down with thoughts of what I’ll be doing once he’s in school.  Toph and I have always agreed that when the kids are both in school, I’d start working – at least part time.  This year is the year to turn my thoughts that way.  X will only be in school for the mornings, which doesn’t give me much time to work a job, but it would give me time to write or do school work.  So, I’m weighing up my options: either I pursue writing far more seriously or I get myself into a school program in order to get a degree.  It begs the questions of what degree I’d get and what kind of writing I want to do.  So, I have a lot on my mind these days.

For now, I guess I’ll succumb to the madness of life with my children.  I’ve had requests to play with bouncy balls in the foyer (oi! I’m ready to hide the darn things!) and we need to go to the library today.  I’ll have to get some pictures of my seedlings and some of the projects me and the kids have done lately.

Here’s hoping your summers are passing more peacefully than mine!

I have been blessed to have known wonderful men and fathers in my life.  Both of my grandfathers, my own father, my father-in-law, and my husband are all men who have contributed much love and care into my life.  I’m thankful for each of them.

I’m not sure what possessed me, but a few days ago I decided the kids and I needed a schedule to follow this summer. It had to be flexible enough to be spontaneous, but firm enough to guide our actions in the day to day.  I dedicated Mondays to sticking around the house, Tuesdays are grocery shopping day, Wednesday we go to the pool, Thursday to the library, and Friday is our Adventure Day, where we go somewhere exciting around town and explore. Adventure Day should mean the zoo, or a museum, or the beach. But, I’m still trying to recover from our late night Wednesday so I wanted to to stick close to home.  So we followed Monday’s schedule more than Friday’s, yesterday.

Here’s what we did:
7-8am: read in bed, watch TV, or check email
8-8:30: breakfast and get dressed
8:30-10: Gardening: planted the rest of the iris and started some seeds in containers
10-10:30: Shower/change clothes, have snack
10:30-12pm: Craft Projects (I was collaging our summer schedule, J was doing a sort of engraving project and X was painting)
12-12:30: Lunch
12:30-1:30: Chores (Clean up lunch dishes, clean kids’ bathroom, scoop cat litter)
1:30-3: Shopping at Home Depot and CVS
3-4: Quiet time
4-5: TV watching

About that time, J got a phone call from a friend inviting her over for the evening. So we dropped her off for that and then went out to eat, instead of eating at home like we were going to. Ooops.

So far, the schedules are popular with the kids, and I liked it too.  I feel like I was more productive today than I normally am, and this made me happy. I felt like the kids enjoyed their day. There was enough time for them to go off on their own and do their own thing, but not so much free time that they were whining at me about boredom. They got to do fun things (gardening and crafts) but it was balanced by getting things done that we needed to get done (chores and shopping).  Jillian especially seemed to appreciate being able to look at the schedule and know what was coming.

I really hope that we can keep up this schedule. I’ve never been one to stick with things like this, except when necessary. But I really think we NEED this structure to our days this year.

So, if you’ve got kids, what do you do to help tame the wild days of summer? How do you keep from hearing “I’m bored” all summer long?